Relationship statuses, who gives a damn? Whether you're single, in a relationship or anywhere in between, try this: date yourself. If you have ever had a partner, you might know how nice it is to spoil him/her/them and yourself with dates. Going out for dinner, a movie, a long sunny forest walk, sauna, brunch. It's so easy to do fun things. Because you're together. That's what makes it fun, right? So when you're not with someone, you can't enjoy any of those things. Right? Wrong!
If there is something I learned in my 27 years on earth, it's that the cliche is true: you have to love yourself before you can fully love someone else. I tried and tested and it is mighty easy to love someone so much I would put myself on the second place. It's beautiful, it's passionate, but it's not enough. Doing all these things for someone else is sweet. For a while. Until restlessness and independence start pulling your sleave, begging you for quality time. So you put on your fanciest piece of clothing, dancing shoes and off you go. Out on a date with the love of your life: your fine and dandy self.
I started doing this about a year ago and it's still an important ritual in my life. One day a week is mine. Sorry friends, boyfriend, responsibilities and grown up life, I'm taking the day off. I do whatever I please, as long as it nourishes my body, mind and soul. All of it! No emails, no paperwork, no worries on my mind because it's date night and I'm dressed up in my glitter gown ready to set the city on fire! Or I'm wearing my Betty Boop PJ's and claim the couch and listen to old scratchy records on repeat. Or I sit in a bubbly bath until I look like a raisin. You get the picture. Spoil yourself! You deserve it. To say it in L'Oreals language: because you're worth it. Especially after a hard week of trying to look like an adult.
Seriously though, get in the bath tub, drink cheap champagne, unleash the god(dess) you are and you'll notice you will be a lot nicer to people. Because you are nicer to yourself. Circle of life! How can you be super(wo)man to the outside world when you don't even have enough time to yourself to chase the birds that have been nesting in your hair? Just saying. Brushing takes time. Make it a part of your date.
No excuses! I'm broke and tired too, but all you need is an hour. Or eight. How ever much time you have to give to yourself. Make the world a better place and take yourself out. Feeling excited but uninspired? No problem, I am the crazy date lady (no cats, just dates) who offers you this exquisite list of ideas:
- Flower markets. Go crazy. Smell, buy, dress up as a flower and don't give a f***.
- That book. That blanket. That couch. It. Is. On.
- Dance party. Dance the night away, drink cocktails, talk to strangers, or just let your body do the talking.
- Bicycle rides to nowhere. Getting lost is the best. That's where I spend most of my time.
- Suit up and go out for dinner. Your absolute favourite dinner. The dinner that you want to have every night but can't have every night. I'm talking fancy pancakes with irish coffee. Or whatever your heart and strange taste desires.
- Buy one expensive amazing chocolate, a cheapo bottle of champagne, get the bath bubbling and dive in. Listen to sweet music, read magazines, do whatever you please because soon you will realise everything is more fun in a bath.
- Pack a picnic and go for a long walk in a forest. Yes it's okay to instagram the shit out of autumn leaves but make sure to put that phone away and actually look around for once in your life. Until I publish my next blogpost. Then you can look at your phone again. ;)
- Sign up for an exciting new class. Something fun. Anything that involves dancing. While wearing glitter outfits. Like ecstatic yoga. Tap dance. Choreographed rollerblading. Or something.
- Take a train to anywhere and spend the day exploring a new place. Be a tourist. Pretend you don't speak the language.
- Flea markets, vintage shops, old record stores. Go insane.
Dressing up is always an option and WILL make your dates and life more successful.