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Writer's pictureJoke De Roeck

Procrastinating the procrastinated



I’ve been unable to write. Then it was all procrastinating until I procrastinated on procrastinating and then I thought: fuck it, just get to the page. To ease into things I’ve been going through my journal of the past two months. I’m a dedicated morning pages writer. For over seven years now, I start the day freewriting a few pages full of words I never plan to read or reread. Maybe just maybe there might be a little gem hidden in the dirt of my blurry minded morning scribbles. Some nice sounding words, a sentence shiny like a pearl. Is it worth going through all of the millions of pages though? I don’t think so.

 

One thing I have been doing is to write a poem after my pages, every single morning. Again, most of it is crap, and that’s totally fine because they will stay in the notebooks forever and ever. I do like to reread the poems I wrote a while ago. As I was reading some poems I penned down a few weeks ago, I stopped in my tracks.

 

On Tuesday October 29th, a massive storm flooded and destroyed Valencia’s neighbouring villages. Many people died, even more got hurt and there are still lots of people missing. The center of the city has been saved from the floods, but everyone is crushed. Anger, sadness and solidarity have moved many people from Valencia, all over Spain and even Europe to help in any way they can. Since day one, thousands of people dressed in boots and carrying brooms, water and food have been crossing the bridge to move as much mud as possible out of homes, garages, businesses, streets.

 

It took politicians, officials and professionals a ridiculously long time to make a move. The people didn’t wait for them and thank goodness they didn’t. Lives were saved and humans in devastating situations were brought meals, water and medicine. The support and generosity has been truly heartwarming and hopeful.

 

Like many, I have lived the past few weeks on very low energy. Darkness was taking over and everything has felt very heavy. That’s another reason why I found it hard to write a blog post. But then I remembered this is my tiny space on the interwebs and I can do what I want. Sometimes that means not writing anything for months, sometimes I give too much information, and all the in betweens.

 

Today I’d like to share two poems I found that I wrote just a few days BEFORE the storm.

 

25.10.2024

 

My heart of hearts

will forever be

amazed

by the beauty of people

generous gestures

helping others

without expecting anything

in return

my deepest heart

will always believe

in the good in people

will always have hope

and a gift of love

 

28.10.2024

 

Tell your people

you love them

take in all the little things

you never you

you just never know

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